Sunday, July 19, 2015

Inner Sanctum (Memoir)

I’ve been here before, disquieted, pondering upon a root.
Structure assists, unable to complete, where suddenly chaos
grew. Most thoughts are challenged, settling for facts,
missing something essential. Deduction becomes a sphinx.
Induction bends iron. In both cases, a core premise is
required. I’ve been here before, awaiting comfort of thought,
phantom to phantom. But what is comfort: a feeling of
tranquility; guiltless communion; or freedom from outside
imposition? Whatever it may be, it leaves to return. It’s
similar to noticing a cigar, or a middle finger: it’s sudden,
even intrusive. I shake it off, a new identity, with a core
premise. We must accept a base, in order to climb a
building. Even as letters feature words, I’m remiss in a deep
respect. For many, it can’t be ‘friended, despite illusion,
negotiation, and a good session. “What is it?” For one
broken in parts, it is a riddle. For one whole, it may be
soothing. “How to determine?” It’s dependent upon inner
dialogue, coupled with results followed by such dialogue.
For example, if inner dialogue leads one to believe in an
outcome, which proves itself as false, time and again, one’s
inner sanctum is in need of training; whereas, if one’s inner
sanctum more times than not correlates with actual reality,
the one in question is blessed. For many of us, it is
complicated, even hassling.  

I’d Save The Reader Years

    The beat becomes sickness. A long crucible—a drilling ecstasy. I was losing focus, feeling forbidden, if to self, if to mirrors. So curs...