Love
selected us this odd assertion for she desired to unlock sooner.
Those railways those hall-breakers
or doors so vast sight becomes blurry; this religious atmosphere throttled by
scientific knowledge where intelligence wrestles to maintain something holy;
our slight war into something grimacing while demons are flooding into foci;
our angel-faces so discarded where a man is shoveling trash-debris; this
wreckage-yard our metaphorical clowns at series or dice rolling into unlucky
sevens; a mind-bender an I.Q. Test or flimsy agency.
It
was late in temperature or early in obligations while a man was feeling
disaster. The moon was distressed where fear was heavy and a woman might feel
uncertain. We had crossed forbidden terrain. The hills were enveloping. Or mudslides
were becoming quicksand. I spoke strongly—I do not trust you—but mania heightened
our reception. Mother’s mother was quite passive, even more accepting, where a
daughter has rights! This hectic millipede those outstanding cheetahs while
mother was running towards a future lover. Naturally, blackness is
confrontational, where blackness has always been under scrutiny—but so many desire
to entertain with blackness. These things we ignore, these labels we subsume,
if blackness becomes those characteristics. But mother was frightened, insomuch
as there was much in transition, plus, many will love you while nothing is
confronting or rubber-banding the relationship. It is a casual affair, a lucky
affair, or something giving more than it takes. This is bonus when a partner is
flowering and cascading and treating the beloved as if perfection had become
human; our arts were nonexistent, our music was sensual, our measures were
things or albums upon repeat; we possessed elements, plus, grandfather was passive
presence, while daughter was life unto its whimsies; indeed, no training,
nothing moralistic, but sheer instinct, as never with sacrifice. This was us, bidding
to deceive humanity, or bidding to manipulate the gods: our needs for
excitement or our wants for arousal where others were welcomed to hide and
visit in the margins: (or to demand loyalty while freedom was liaisons and life
was sweet entertainment). It was destined to fail. It was easy to voyage. It was
life to embark upon our sufferings.
In
its aftermath, one is proud of something uncertain, to need emphatic proof, or
sullen into darkness. I was once a puppy lost in mother’s gaze while training
to become something fragile: our needs for structure, our battlefields for
pride, where most are pure and uncircumcised arrogance. I imagine telic
heart-skies or grounded insecurities while just hanging-out has become the
norm. —for days were observation into lakes filled with turmoil while faraway
creeks promised more sorrow; our habits as creatures, our selfishness until
deaths, at others laughing and playing our guitars— (we hunt for Mayberry, we
clutch major ideals, but often people are not equipped to make their children satisfied).
