Dear
Endlessness. the math of clouds the history of feuds so determined to deceive
you. by exile such tender sadness while I imagine a human. those red vines such
rich licorice where most reject the black ones: a brown fisherman, or black balking,
or ivory sugarcane. I was gargling liquor. but nothing was wrong. I was so
independent. such singsong speeches such mental acrobatics if to believe like
resistance in freedom. such bad apples. so much versus good apples. where
sensing an aesthetic instrument causes an attraction. but zillions into flights
or attitudinal values where it often seems stressed: our sky-pages those
evaluations where intense people check innards quite often. a subtle burn a
subtle chapter they might extend into an argument. (so many jasmine lizards or crucifix
lizards or salty, undelivered, demanding agitations.) so much attesting to
insults. or so eclipsed by measurements. where so many need control.
I
watched a dragonfly. I played in a swimming pool. it seemed inconsequential.
years would mean pain the familiar invisibility while something is disruptive:
thought-undertakers; seeping irritability; or facing a person where your
presence isn’t acceptable.
it
would first destroy innocence it would soon cause anger while it has now become
first priority. (we never sense how
deep into soil a person is willing to travel. we never know if a person is
wrestling with features. like we never know how valuable a stranger might
become.) such a filthy platypus or
those nameless species as we often say, “I don’t know what she is going
through.” or “I can never understand him.”
by
intrinsic rules where it requires intuition while theology is appealing to the
greatest senses in us: those palatial ideals, as knowing I might reach by core,
or having resilience to pursue the god in us. such tender Namaste, or
minds debating social catnip, or a mother receiving her son’s death. but an
inner shrine but a mannequin feeling if not a silent, melancholic, unbearable
insistence. our gravestone souls
where it seems inconsequential but it bothers us terribly.
so
many jigsaw applications so much dreamwood while our children are having
visions: they see the eternal boyfriend the dedicated girlfriend or those
determined characteristics: they have a shot at happiness, or love, or
something as it remains pure. so
unhooked. so let go. where time seems to prove essentials. they are most excellent, most proud, where
I can’t envy the process: where temperaments sputter, or feelings fill the
guest-brains, while some respects appear ungoverned. the great sailboat those large promises
while I mainly need to grow: to have us to plead us while dying to live us. a
small vessel, a petite canyon, or a person you adore too uncomfortably.
such
religion to sin with you to devour pride with you or so indebted it was
nice to run from you. the ferocious
panther, or the watchful bobcat, or a friend so close she may never do too much
wrong. every man in his armor. every
woman to her crown. while no matter how noble, we remind ourselves that this is
our friend. this place in minds this watt for a given person while we admire so
many other persons. such vertigo
while existence spins where it was a miracle to cherish you. such raw terror or
visceral emotion or violet a sky so turquoise. our souls pleated or connected. our
spirits naked seeking revival. or to know with patience an impatient volume. society rights imply societal obligation.
but loving one so incompletely must be iniquity. while years have become
overly-meditated.
