Let the
ghosts from ghetto halls and cells and walls be so gentle that night into
deaths—our breathing irregular our hatred askew to despise so deeply we fall
into love’s haven; those blue eyes this detriment skin those roses and daisies
if but to abort this feeling; our cobble in chains, our aloof creatures in
cocaine and God knew well nor did She intervene; those musical ropes as
looking and madmen while madwomen spoke crazily and danced before traffic; this
beer dynasty this filthy floor dynasty or this toddler staring and soundless
reaching for eye-composure. I darkness an attraction so uncured and unhealed
peering into terrific fantasies; black walnut eyes or sap too thick to dishpan
and terrible affection filled with concrete lusts; this friendly roach this
flea with teeth or this young possum found Watts in this eclipsed city; those
dreams but mommy-made those tears into white sheets or this old black woman
that despises blacks. I can’t shake a smile lurid into sandpapered carpet a bit
friendly but angry as rockets; gazing for ghetto-born always interested in businesses
and so opinionated one might listen.
I felt
lyric at hands those streets so abused and dynamite upon a an earlobe; our
righteousness determined by blood-diamonds our women losing identity where some
elements aren’t as important as money; this ghost with Jesus this private room
face while granny hovered aside a bed speaking Galilean—to check her pulse so wrapped
in voodoo or repenting and running from those intimate brains; such scandalous loses
to become too involved a skeleton a map a beer and pure free loses; defused and
so dark or radiantly ugly at children losing but taking where a son just
redeemed mother. [so coastal speeding and racing aloof and gutted at miracles
this mad-man meant to pass-out; so luxurious a woman out of Brentwood and such
a curse and such force wrestling with big phantoms; to hold her business to die
her allure at pictures plus a miscarriage; this pill thing this wine thing this
beer for one so present it became pretty trauma; losing leads where panic
tackles and stars were want for appellate court].
Ghetto
glances a bit harsh a bit hard while father came to visit; indeed to hit indeed
to bounce and not a coin for the penny-bank;
firsthand notions or livid back hearts as amazed to feel a woman in Oxnard;
this dance with wings this fledgling losing mercy while father forced son to
fly at two; mommy is crazy this Christmas our lights are on a tree and plus a
gift; this muscle land this magic crown at something fat with vagueness; our
brains hung our pots for drums so excited forging a good time; such sugar-water
such rice-cakes and granny is wrestling with schizophrenia; our genetic
harbinger, plus, his side, while mother is keeping peace; glowing in red velvet
and talking like mystery while someone is prone to ask for forgiveness.
I change
to dash looking for healing-hands while days are sick with Miss Incognito; this
deep addict so ill towards sobriety but solemn a good sense; where ghosts are
drugs and phantoms are heroin and goblins are myriad personality battles—this warrior,
he must die, this Pharaoh, he must die or this Gentile Jewish zealot. I live in
shadows; I set fire to closets and God appealed on torn sentenced ambivalence;
this deeper ambition this lunch for dinner-ambition or this dinner for breakfast-ambition;
or fasting for years flown in gravels and nibbling Chronicles; our unfair harms
at something a corner-market while left and needing rightly; our twenty-year
furniture or this plastic covered couch at grandpa an insulin rush; so dead
into it so alive into it where resistance proves something needing maintenance;
to adore you so much but mainly because you ignore temptation and I hope by
gods and demons and life this forever frequency.
