…we
try measures, upon behavioral charts, upon tragedy: such literature eyes, such
cantankerous eyes, at treasured frustrations: those inner times, those haven guts, our deep problems—while born backwards,
free-flowing forward, abandoned to abandoned skin: those rubric skies, such as
dynamite, our stars reversing motion: those apish magnets, our knuckles
chuckling, our hearts passionate: to write for sun-ship, to analyze by hearths,
at something by something but crashing: our adored musicals, our troubling
concertos, at opera daily by functions: at granny’s surprise, at mother’s
laughs, or absent but seated center circle: our emergencies, our brains, our
souls—those flickering wicks, our flickering emotion, at faraway feelings: to
run to self, leaping hurdles, while falling asleep as falling short: at
ridiculous angles, while tangled with grasshoppers, a bit too heavy for
weblock….
…let
us try, as souls gunning, as infatuated giants: those ways, as crazed
sophistication, so raunchy as afflicted: our tortured cries, our ruby violet
wines, our agonies splayed into diamonds: at courses giggling, found by
impetuous speech, at eyes looking tortured: our guts affected, our walls
climbing, our dice reneging: at bouncy roses, or fluffy petals, while Love
struck a daisy: our maddened alleys, our traipsing nightmares, our gremlins,
ghosts and mayhem—as split asunder, our screens refreshed, our sundry
appetites—as suppressed souls, or salacious abandonments, while needing
respect: this cruel existence, as requiring troublemakers, while condemning
looseness: this need for other than mother, this yearning for mother, while
conflicted by real women: this creative essence, this full throttle, at
magician type energies: our forces blending, our hearts alike a furnace, while
running from deeper dissections….
I
reappear, looking at sheer differences, while alike to silence: our graves with
cinnamon, our tombs with honey, our cloth begging in tongues: this frequent
discussion, this tale of babblings, those oceans aglow with helium: this shift
today, that edge today, while writing retrieved as running today: to go for
deeper, while needing rest, where something seeped into essence: such rich
contempt, such needs for Excedrin, or some atypical pill making life
reasonable: at Advil and coffee, at something tender about lies, while confused
for realizing such distance: those meaningless years, our trifle union, running
into valleys: those rapid feelings, such trenchant emotion, abated but elated
while whispering to features: that ghost-lady, that mini-phantom, that gorgeous
galaxy: at jinn-like feelings, this inner witness, those barking winds: at deep
experience, but alike to silence, for years were spent cultivating
invisibility: at Love, rebuked, at God, screaming, at Jesus asking for more: if
but to relive, or but to re-die, while awake coming with beauty: those fairer
cries, this noisy missive, at daughters removed from existence!
…has
nothing changed, while everything changes, where it felt life to change: this
fairer warfare, this bedroom darkness, those feral kisses: to awaken at
midnight, to stand over silence, to urinate and return to bed: that soft voice,
inquiring of soul, while bent about inter-relation: as dying for something,
unaware of this something, or but a hint this glimpse: to ask for silence, to
want satisfaction, as returning home so silently lonely: our minds wreaking
chaos, our guts needing passion, or deep satisfying conversation: (I came to
you, not to hear my thoughts, but to receive a certain dialogue): so more to
creativity, as more to this life, while we play tremendous games: or something
human, as something intimate, as not worrying about addictions: this solemn
suggestion, this feudal reality, while tripping over something said…!
